Part One
Aurelia Dhanamony Paul
This is the life story of my mother. She was born in India in 1910 graduated in Medicine at CMC Vellore, and migrated to Sri Lanka after marriage. A dedicated woman, smart, caring, and intelligent. But destiny had brought various twists in her life.
Childhood.
Aurelia Dhanamony was the first born for Sophie and J I Manickavasagam belonging to Cumbum, in Theni district, Madurai. Her father was a local convert . He had met Sophia in Madurai- she belonged to a Hindu Brahmin family – an accomplished woman; daughter of a high court lawyer. She was a believer in Christianity and fell in love with Isaac Manickavasagam. When they got married, Sophia was disowned by her family. Sophia and Isaac chose to settle in Cumbum.
Aurelia pet-named Petcy, and was an obedient, quiet and religious girl. She was very good in her studies and was always a favorite of her teachers. Invariably the youngest in class she was smart and active. Her mother was a pianist and Petcy also learnt to play the piano.
Their’s was a large family.. Dorai, Jeya, Dhana, Victor were her younger brothers. Pankajam was the only sister. It was a happy family. Isaac was the Headmaster of the local school. He also had a church, where he was the pastor. Sophie was a faithful wife, bringing up the family. She was a great cook, having learnt to make non vegetarian dishes as well.
Around this time Dr. Ida Scudder had started her medical school in a place called Vellore near Katpadi. Petcy dreamt of becoming a doctor, and was encouraged by her parents.
Her friend and companion in the house was her aunt Tracy. She was slender and had very long hair .She used to correspond with Petcy regularly. Petcy’s younger sister Pankajam was mischievous and petted by everyone
She was also fond of her cousins James And Raj Isaac in Vellore. Petcy was a quiet and prayerful girl, good at studies and was everyone’s favorite.
In 1927, she was the youngest student accepted by Christian Medical College Vellore , in the Licentiate Medical Practitioner (LMP) course. Though for the first time she was far away from home, Petcy settled down to an exciting study period of 4 years. There she met another beautiful girl called Zeline Parker and became friends with her. Zeline was from Parker Home, an orphanage run by American missionaries. It was to be a lifelong friendship, which carried them through thick and thin. Zeline and Petcy always travelled together going home and returning to CMC.
As a doctor in Madurai
Petcy enjoyed her time in CMC. She loved medicine. She was happiest to care for her patients and interact with them.
On completing the course she joined Madurai mission hospital. She also worked in Cumbum, Theni, Bodinayakanur. She was the only lady doctor for miles around in those villages. Therefore night calls for deliveries were common. In the pitch dark, when there was no electricity she had delivered babies with the help only of lantern lights. She had tackled obstructed labour by craniotomy or decapitation. She often travelled by bullock carts with a helper, she served the people in those areas
She also worked in Kenneth Hospital Madurai.
Marriage
She was barely 21 and there was a missionary from Ceylon, who was looking for a bride like her for one Joel Paul who incidentally was a very rich man 44 years old, from Tellippalai Jaffna. He was a builder and contractor. He had married twice. The first wife died of tuberculosis. The second wife had mental illness and was divorced. He had no children. If Petcy were to marry Joel she will have a very comfortable home indeed and could support her brothers to study. Petcy’s parents were in a dilemma. They were not rich , and could just make ends meet. There were 4 more siblings who needed to be educated. Mother Sophie was not well – she had bouts of asthma.
Joel was twice Petcy’s age and a widower and divorcee. Was this marriage essential at all?
Joel visited Petcy and was lavish with his gifts to everyone. Petcy agreed to marry him. And so they did marry. For the first time Petcy left her beloved family behind in India and flew to Kankesanturai Jaffna in Ceylon.
Petcy in Tellippalai, Jaffna
Petcy started her life in Tellippalai. Everything was different. Tamil intonation and words were peculiar to Jaffna, and so even conversing with common people needed an effort. People were curious to see whom Joel married… a doctor from India. The house was in a huge campus and was large, Helpers were scarce and so Petcy had to work hard from morning till night to care for her husband and keep the house. In the meantime she was trying to get herself employed. Ceylon medical council did not recognize her LMP degree. Hopes and dreams of career as a doctor crashed for this young woman. Joel refused to send her back to India for one year of study which would have qualified her with an MBBS degree, eligible to practice in Sri lanka. Aspirations of a medical missionary went flying through the air.. she was heartbroken.
In 1934 Wesley a son was born to her. Three years later Leela a bonny baby arrived, followed by Padma. The Tamils in Jaffna looked down on Indian Tamils, because many Tamils from South India had migrated to the tea estates in Ceylon, recruited as laborers. This did not help Petcy who was scorned by Joel’s relatives and neighbors, despite the fact that she was a doctor and much more educated than them. She was close to one sister in law, Jeeva wife of Daniel Paul. Jeeva was also from India. These two families were close to each other. Jeeva was also a pious lady like Petcy and hence this friendship thrived and helped both of them to cope in the tough circumstances.
By this time Joel was busy in Kandy, a hill town in Central province. He and his brother Samuel Paul were famous for their building skills and had won many accolades. They were sincere, hardworking skilled and principled, Lighthouses in Kankesanturai, Puttalam, Schools and colleges and hospitals in Jaffna, Colombo and Kandy were the handiwork of Joel and Samuel.
Joel became financially very comfortable. He had built 3 houses in Kandy near Kattugastota- very attractive compact houses. But he had frequent attacks of malaria, which then was an epidemic in Ceylon. Petcy did not know anything about the financial aspects of the family. Money was not important to her and did not tempt her in any way.
Petcy went to live with Joel in Katugastota. Joel’s nieces Gnanam, Chellamma also lived with them. They were much older to us children, pursuing Teacher’s training course. Joel Petcy’s children Wesley, Padma and Leela joined the local schools. Another child Raja was born here- and he grew up to be an intelligent affectionate kid. Petcy was a good housewife and loved her family.
One of the maids was from India, and she started a romantic relationship with a man next door. That man had a grudge against Joel, stemming from some business deals, and he tried to harm Joel through this girl. Twice she tried poisoning his food. Joel sent it for analysis and it was found to be Arsenic. This attempt to murder Joel failed. One day, Raja was struggling for breath, and Joel’s niece found marbles in his mouth and removed hem- was it an accident or was it a murder plot?
One sad day, Raja went missing. People ran helter skelter. The police arrived and investigated. It was a nightmare. Petcy’s heart was broken to bits. There were notices everywhere asking for whereabouts of this little boy. Two days later, they found Raja’s body washed ashore on the banks of Mahaweli ganga river. An accident again? The coroner who examined the body and brain of Raja said that Sri Lanka has lost a great man- because of the convolutions in the brain.
A few weeks later, the maid confessed to Petcy that it was she who had thrown Raja into the river. Petcy was stunned and was contemplating how to tackle the situation as this maid was from India. That night the maid committed suicide, leaving a note about her relationship with the neighbor. At the autopsy she was found to be two months pregnant. Petcy and Joel were devastated realizing that their dear son was murdered by their maid. Heartbroken, they managed to find solace in prayer.
Joel had a temper. He would flare up for trivial issues. Many times if there was less salt or too much salt in the curry, he would topple the table- crockery, cutlery and all. He threw plates around. He loved his wife and children but would rarely show affection openly. Communication between them dwindled so much so that Petcy was afraid to talk to him. This affected the children as well. They hardly spoke to the father. Whenever Joel returned home, the children who were happily playing till then, would run and hide themselves in the rooms.
Joel was facing financial difficulties and had to sell the 3 houses one by one. The family decided to return to Tellippalai Jaffna
A day in the life of Petcy (at Tellippalai)
She wakes up by 5 a.m. as the cock crows. Her first half an hour is spent talking to God. Her prayers were loud and intense, claiming God’ s promises. She prays for each and every family member. Then she goes to milk the cows. Not an easy job. She has to sit on a stool, talk to the cows as she draws the milk. She feeds the cows with hay and water. In the ’40s and ’50s, maybe even now, Jaffna villages were infested with snakes, and she had to watch her every move, as well as the surroundings.
Then she makes coffee or tea for the children. Breakfast is either idiyappam or puttu or bread. For Idiyappam she had to pound soaked and dried rice and – which she always kept in stock. Some of the maids around used to help her for a fee. Side dishes had to be made. Cooking was done with firewood and was not easy. There was a vent pipe. Sometimes she made aappam – hoppers and these tasted yummy with coconut milk and sugar. In Sri Lanka coconut was indispensible. Every meal had at least one dish made using coconut which needs to be scraped using a special gadget – another difficult task to do twice or thrice a day.
She sets the table for breakfast – This is always done very neatly. Plates, glasses, cups and saucers, water jug, dishes. Each child has to be coaxed to eat after morning ablutions. The table was cleared, in which task all of the children participated. Cleaning of the house begins next. Bed making, sweeping, setting everything neat, bringing back the night lamps to where they belong. The verandahs need to be swept as leaves and branches would have littered the place.
Water has to be drawn from the well and poured through a pipe into the bathroom nearby and the tub in front, All vessels had to be filled as there was no running water. Vegetable lady and fish seller come home as the market was just a few yards ahead. They exchanged pleasantries before selling .
By the afternoon the all familiar bread man will come ringing the bell of his cycle. The smell of hot bread and the buns and the cakes was welcome by all children who will run to him. He will make a note of his sales in the notebook and collect payment later.
Clothes had to be washed by hand. Leela the elder daughter helpsed Petcy along with maids if there were any. One gardener came daily to water the trees. Each tree had an area with a small entry which was open and later closed, as water flowed along the shallow mud canal from the well.
In the evenings when dusk was settling, Petcy and her daughters cleaned the glass of all the kerosene lamps, with vim powder and paper. A petrolmax light was lit to be kept in the verandah till we closed the doors. The kerosene lamps were carried to each room that was being used. Lunch and dinner had to be made daily, by Petcy who tirelessly toiled for her children. By 7.30 pm there were family prayers. Children took turns to beat the drums, play the tambourine and sing. After Bible reading Petcy always prayed. After dinner children retired to bed. Petcy would ensure all doors were locked in that lonely bungalow. She even looked under the beds for thieves.
The house was spic and span. Beds were made up with white bed sheets and pillow cases. Brass on the doors and tables always sparkled. Whoever visited the house was in admiration of the housekeeping of Petcy. In the mornings Petcy would get the children ready for school. Bright white uniforms and polished shoes were the norm. In the evenings homework was done with help from Petcy or the older children.
Plucking leaves for the animals at home also fell on Petcy’s shoulders. Children accompanied her as she did that. Feeding the animals with “penance” was done by her if the gardener was absent. Medical emergencies were attended at home- probably the only place where Petcy used her professional skills.
continued
Daisy's blogs 